An Award-Winning Disclaimer

A charming little Magpie whispered this disclaimer into my ear, and I'm happy to regurgitate it into your sweet little mouth:

"Disclaimer: This blog is not responsible for those of you who start to laugh and piss your pants a little. Although this blogger understands the role he has played (in that, if you had not been laughing you may not have pissed yourself), he assumes no liability for damages caused and will not pay your dry cleaning bill.

These views represent the thoughts and opinions of a blogger clearly superior to yourself in every way. If you're in any way offended by any of the content on this blog, it is clearly not the blog for you. Kindly exit the page by clicking on the small 'x' you see at the top right of the screen, and go fuck yourself."

Monday, November 16, 2009

Show Week

Yes, it's show week. "Pirates of Penzance" opens Thursday, with much jollity and Victorian gayness. Consequently, My Masonic Apron is going to be a bit of a quieter place than it normally is, until we get back to regularly-scheduled programming on Monday.

And I lose the rampant sideburns and the sleeping ferret under my nose.

Yesterday, my wife and I were at rehearsal from 10am until 11pm, and I think it's safe to say that I've only ever worked that long continuously once in my life, as an EMT, when I did two eight-hour shifts in a row as a favor to some shithead who probably didn't even know my first name from my last name.

After loading pickup trucks and a trailer with scenery, unloading, doing a three-hour sing-through with the orchestra, and running the show with stops-and-starts for the first time on the actual stage, my brain probably resembles the gunk underneath your refrigerator combined with four-month-old fermented applesauce.

That said, why don't you just scroll down and enjoy the posts from Saturday and Sunday, because today's basically a loss. Fortunately, tomorrow I don't have to be at work until 12:00pm, so you and I can have our fun together then. Chances are, though, you'll be okay with catching up on the weekend's posts, as very few people, I think, read blogs on the weekend, let alone write them.

Thank God for dorks, right?


  1. ha .. I read them on the weekend. Looking forward to tomorrow!
    As for the show? Break a leg!


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