An Award-Winning Disclaimer

A charming little Magpie whispered this disclaimer into my ear, and I'm happy to regurgitate it into your sweet little mouth:

"Disclaimer: This blog is not responsible for those of you who start to laugh and piss your pants a little. Although this blogger understands the role he has played (in that, if you had not been laughing you may not have pissed yourself), he assumes no liability for damages caused and will not pay your dry cleaning bill.

These views represent the thoughts and opinions of a blogger clearly superior to yourself in every way. If you're in any way offended by any of the content on this blog, it is clearly not the blog for you. Kindly exit the page by clicking on the small 'x' you see at the top right of the screen, and go fuck yourself."

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Femme Blog

According to some statistic that someone cited somewhere at some point, on the website 20something bloggers, there are 7,942 bloggers registered as members, and only around 900 of those members are males.

I'm left to ask the intellectually-stimulating question, "What the fuck is that all about?"

Seriously, sometimes I look at the 129 "friends" I have collected nigh these many months, and I feel like a total whoremaster, supervising my burgeoning, ballooning brothel. There's Laura the pilot, Mila with the roses popping out of her cleavage, Kate the poet, Sarah with the camera, Floreta with the vibrators, and, most recently, Leslie with the eye-patch. It's quite a collection of damsels, really. Any whoremaster would be proud.

There was a time where I felt selfconscious about having accrued so many BWB (bloggers with breasts) as online acquaintances, but I don't think I can honestly feel guilty about it due to the extreme saturation of the 20something blogging market by womenfolk.

It's interesting to note that, in the 18th, 19th and even 20th century, the vast majority of published writers were men, and that's no accident. The vast majority of book publishers and literary agents were men, too. It was not acceptable for women to write and publish material. Just ask Jane Austen, whose family was never quite thrilled about her professional aspirations.

Fortunately now, there are many, many women in the book publishing and literary agent industry. I should know, I've received rejection letters from most of them. So, with the increase in written, published work written by women, it should be no surprise that women are also taking the blogging world by storm.

My question is: why?

What is so appealing about tapping those deliciously manicured nails to the keyboard for women? Women have a reputation for being more sensitive than men, more open to revealing themselves and their inner feelings, and a whopping shitload of them were English majors in college.

So, is that it? Have I answered my own question? I don't know-- I don't think so.

There must be something about writing, about blogging, something about its freedom, its unemcumbered, unadorned form that appeals to women, but I don't know what it is. I guess that's why I have a comments section.

When I first started blogging, and for a while after, I didn't read any blogs. "I don't want to be influenced," I would say. "I want to be original and fresh." I worry about that a lot. If I'm going to play a part onstage, and another local company is doing the same show, I will avoid seeing the show at all costs, because I don't ever want to be accused of "copying" or "stealing," "mimicking" someone else's work. It's a youthful arrogance, a holdout from my younger days when I did copy others whom I admired-- and that fear of being caught nowadays petrifies me into almost total creative isolation.

Now, though, I read several blogs, and almost every one of them is written by a woman. I like women writers, because they are different than me. They are thoughtful, introspective and they are careful, considered, sometimes eloquent. They think about things I would never think to think about, and they open me up to different perspectives, and I appreciate that. I never thought I would like reading blogs, but I think I do. I guess I'm growing up a little.

When I write a play, I often struggle to create authentic female characters. Oftentimes they don't show up in my plays, because the challenge of writing honestly for a woman scares the piss out of me. I feel incapable and inept. The only woman I've ever included in a play who sounded true was my mother, because I couldn't get her wrong if I tried. There is a poignancy and a firm wisdom that I can only watch from a distance and appreciate.

I suppose, in the end, why there are so many women bloggers out there and so few male bloggers isn't really important. It's a fine discussion topic to start and in which to participate, but it doesn't matter much. We bloggers all bring something different to the table, even those of us who just post YouTube clips or pictures of cellphones encrusted with Swarovski crystals.


  1. I keep hearing about the "extinction of the male blogger" and yet, honestly, I'd say about 75% of the blogs I read are written by males. Maybe, like you, I'm drawn to the opposite gender's perspective. Honestly, though, I just look for well-written engaging blogs and the majority of the ones I enjoy happen to be written by men. Maybe because there are so many female bloggers the blogs I find tend to feel the same, with exceptions of course, whereas if you click on a male picture on 20SB you're almost guaranteed something out of the ordinary. Who knows, eh?

  2. Hehe, maybe you should share some links, Lindsay -- I struggle to find any male blogs that actually engage me.

    But then again, most female blogs fail to engage me too... hm... (there's only so much mindless emotional drivel that I can withstand).

    Having said that, blogs used to engage me more. Maybe I'm reaching 'maturity'.

    But yeah, quite odd that 20sb is almost entirely female. I assume it has a lot to do with women finally being able to 'speak their minds', something they haven't been able to for a long time. It's also no surprise that about 90% of their readers are also female... :)

  3. Sebby--

    My blog doesn't engage you?

    Ought I to commence posting pictures of my tadger?

  4. Todger! TODGER! I think tadger is acceptable though, to be fair.

    Sure, it's engaging, kinda.

    It's very hard to engage me to be honest... at least in the written form. Or rather, I get bored quite quickly once I think I've 'heard it all'.

    I read a lot of blogs, but there are very, very few that make me go 'ooh ooh, a new post!' when the count goes up to '1' in my RSS reader.

    Mainly they are sciency/geeky ones :)

  5. I see.

    Very well.

    Expect, in the very near future, to see pictures of my tudger dressed in a white lab coat.

  6. With comedy glasses... and a fake beard! Or maybe that can be real...

  7. hahaha floreta with the vibrators.
    oh, dear. so that's what i'm known for now :D

    i like coming to your blog cos you have such varying topics. i agree with seb.. blogs used to engage me more. i think that has more to do with me than other bloggers though. maybe i'm running out of steam..

  8. It's nice to be in one of the only environments where being a man is unusual. It's a bit like sneaking into the women's changing room, only without the inevitable arrest and restraining order.

  9. I'm with MLS. Defintely a Peeping Tom.

    From what I've seen, most male bloggers tend to focus on a specific subject like their career or IT or movies etc whilst most female bloggers have more personal blogs which I prefer.

    That said, I follow a great roster of male blogs. Mr London Street, Andy Warhol goes shopping, Badass Geek, Simon's Ramblings, Organic Meatbag, Advice and Humor from Mr Condescending etc...If anyone has any other suggestions let me know.

  10. Floreta--

    "It's not you, it's me..."

    I love it!


Got something to say? Rock on with your badass apron!